I set very high goals and become demotivated when I dont achieve them. I always want to be the best at everything, and that used to motivate me, but now I failed a couple of things, I'm becoming demotivated

Setting high goals can sometimes lead to demotivation when faced with failure, but there are strategies to manage and overcome these feelings.

1. Reframe Goals: Cognitive scientist Maya Shankar suggests reframing goals from avoidance (e.g., avoiding failure) to approach orientation (e.g., pursuing success). This subtle shift makes success easier to measure and track, helping to maintain motivation 1.

2. Visualize Failure: If struggling with motivation, visualizing the negative consequences of not achieving your goals can be powerful. Andrew Huberman explains how thinking about the discomfort of failure for 1-3 minutes can harness the body's stress response to increase motivation 2.

3. Acknowledge the Middle Problem: Motivation often dips in the middle of a goal pursuit. Recognize this common issue and break tasks into smaller chunks to maintain focus and motivation 3.

   The Power of Framing

   Maya Shankar

   Andrew Huberman

   Maya shares how reframing goals in terms of approach rather than avoidance can be more motivating and measurable. She also discusses the impact of a small word change in motivating veterans to access a government benefit. Andrew reflects on the challenges of behavioral change and the importance of invoking a verb state within us.

   

   Huberman Lab

   Dr. Maya Shankar: How to Shape Your Identity & Goals | Huberman Lab Podcast

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4. Balance Pleasure and Effort: High performers often face the "fat cat syndrome," where early success leads to complacency. It's crucial to balance the drive for external achievements with practices that bring internal calm and joy, like cultivating good sleep and mindfulness routines 4.

5. Accept Failure as Growth: Embrace failure as part of the learning and growth process. Adam Grant recommends setting a "failure budget" to encourage risk-taking and innovation without fear of failure 5.

Implementing these strategies can help you navigate high expectations and maintain motivation, even after setbacks.